"Whenever you're in conflict with someone, there is one factor that can make the difference between damaging your relationship and deepening it. That factor is attitude."
William James
Understanding stages
of conflict
Latent Conflict: Many conflicts occur due to differences in needs, values, goals, and available resources. Triggering Incident: A small event or communication can bring hidden issues to the surface. Conflict: Emotions intensify, communication may break down, and parties often focus on defending themselves rather than resolving the issue. New Equilibrium: The conflict is resolved or managed, and a new understanding or balance is established between the parties involved. Moving through these stages will go faster if the following steps are taken: 1. Identify the core issue, assumptions, or misunderstandings involved. 2. Reflect on emotions and perspectives - yours, others, and the needs and concerns involved. 3. Communicate effectively using I statements - example of first 3, "I feel frustrated when deadlines aren't met because it affects my schedule. I need us to set realistic timelines." 4. Listen actively when other individuals speak and reflect back what you hear them saying. Also ask clarifying questions, "Can you tell me more about...?" 5. Brainstorm solutions together without judgment aiming for win-win outcomes, picking the best for both parties. 6. Agree on clear terms stating who will do what and when and decide how progress will be monitored. 7. Schedule regular check-ins to maintain new equilibrium. 8. Reflect and celebrate relational improvement, lessons learned, and how lessons prevent future conflicts.
hope for
those who've had
setbacks & conflicts
You may have had good teaching as you grew up, but failed to sow good things. Inner conflicts and poor choices separate us from God and his Holy Spirit, who enables us to surrender to God and trust His will for our lives. We can easily live our lives without God. That is how things are in this world. But finding the humility and courage to face those conflicts comes through Christ and his Holy Spirit. The above conflict stages could help you arrive at new approaches. May you find the grace and strength to repent and follow Him daily.
Some children and young adults who are raised in Christian families experience confusion and doubts about their faith when they leave home, when they face antagonistic views in college, when they stop going to church, when they date or marry an an unbeliever, or when personal sin separates them from God. The testing of one's faith can have a beneficial effect when one is able to honestly share with another Christian brother or sister what is happening in their life. Parents and grandparents can also offer prayer and support during these difficult periods of life. If this has happened to you, please ask God for courage to share what's happening in your life. Don't avoid your family or your church during this difficult time. God can bring you home.
have you
received the
help you
need ?
Disciples of Jesus don't claim to be perfect, just forgiven. He keeps us and makes us faithful. If we could pray for you or search the Scriptures for His help for you, where you are right now, and day by day going forward, please take the time to reach out to us. We count it a privilege to be here for you.